True ReforminJ

Selflessness is an important factor in marriages, relationships, and friendships. It is the key to happiness and fulfillment. Though important, it is paid little or no attention. There's practically a lot of talk about self-confidence, self-awareness, self-esteem and this isn't bad in itself. However, life doesn't have to be about our selfish purposes all the time. Instead of living to advance and achieve our selfish goals, we can live to solve the problems we encounter in the world. We can strive to be or provide a solution to the problems of other people.  When you take time to critically look at inventors, their inventions were never for themselves. For example, Mary Anderson didn't invent a windshield wiper for herself, Neil Arnott didn't invent a waterbed for himself neither did Fredrick Banting invent insulin for himself. They all worked hard at ensuring they solved a problem they encountered while they were alive. We strive daily to outdo other pe

If you're reading this article, it means you desire a better you or ensure you are still on the right track which you set for yourself.  Integrity is the practice of being honest and showing consistent and uncompromising adherence to strong moral and ethical principles and values in the presence or absence of anybody. It has to do with how accurate, honest, and truthful your actions are.  Many times we have to make decisions that define who we are and what we believe in. The choices we face may seem to be insignificant but this doesn't mean it's not important to us. So whether it's lying about something, pretending to be who you're not, claiming to be who you're not, saying you have what you don't have. However minute what you have to decide on is, it has an impact on your self-respect, integrity, and reputation. In the world today, the people being talked about most are people who have made the choice of being on the other side of integrity. Peo

One of the things that was in the mind of God when He created man was that He wanted to have fellowship, communion and an interaction with man. In all His creation, He did something different in man that will enable His desired relationship with him to be accomplished. God wants us to hear Him and that's why He did not breath into plants or animals the breath of the Almighty, the Spirit of God. He breathed into man this breath of life so that there can be something in man that can pick up signals from the Eternal God.  "We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand what God has freely given us." 1 Cor. 2:12. So even though God seems to be withdrawn from physical sight, He wants to be involved in our lives. Every moment, He's transmitting signals of information across to us. And because He wants us to hear Him, He put in us something that will enable us to receive information from Him. Its just like havi

I see a lot of people looking so beautiful and handsome on the outside but when they speak to you especially concerning what you disagree with, their words are nothing short of manipulative and controlling. Have you met people who play with your mind instead of coming out straight to ask you for something they want or need your help with. When they do something wrong, they immediately turn the table around and play victim and suddenly make you feel guilty about something you know nothing about. This is termed verbal abuse. Verbal abuse is the use if words to demean, frighten, control, insult, humiliate and manipulate someone. It most times happens out of no where in a relationship. It makes the person on the receiving end to second guess themselves, blame themselves or even wonder if they are over reacting. Often times, the verbally abusive person calculates his words and therefore it is insidious. It is usually done in private where there won't be a third party interfe

Have you ever felt betrayed by someone? Personally I have a couple of times and the funny part of it is that it often happens with the people we trust. I was hurt, angry and disappointed because I could not understand how someone I care about would do such to me.  Discussions on friendships are always very interesting because at one point or another everyone has or had a friend. For the best of us, we can invest all our body and soul into a friendship and still be disappointed. Friendship is a commitment and it involves loyalty. However, the fact is that successful friendships are no longer guaranteed and that is why we need to learn how to let go, forgive and move forward from disloyalty. Loyalty is the quality of being faithful to commitments. However, I heard this saying, " loyalty has an expiration date " and then I saw it. So how do you know disloyal people; -you question their friendship, that is their commitment to you. -you cannot count on them. -you find

Resilience deals with how well you can handle with and bounce back from the difficulties of life. It is the difference between handling pressure and maintaining your cool. Simply put, it is the ability to bounce back during or after difficult times and get back to feeling as good as before.  Characteristics of Resilient people: Resilient people tend to be optimistic and cope with stress more effectively. They are able to adapt to difficult circumstances that they can't change and keep on thriving. Instead of giving up, they learn from the different situations. In addition to these, they; -are committed to things or a course and follow through till the end. -recognize their limits to control. -engage in supporting others. -have a sense of humour. -can easily adapt to change. Importance of Building Resilience Building resilience helps you bounce back after you face challenges, setbacks, disappointment and failures. Your ability to move on from a bad situation for example

You'd be wondering why this topic?, why do I have to be the best at a job I already don't like?, why not just quit the moment I dislike it?. These questions are not out of line. The reason is that a survey carried out few years back has disclosed that more than half of employees don't like their jobs. However since that's what we have to do at the moment, my guess is that we have to be our best in it. So I'd want to discuss that period between when we get a job we'll have full satisfaction in and while we are doing what we currently do.  It is really difficult putting up with dissatisfaction and so it is very easy to detect when a person don't like their job anymore. They begin to do it haphazardly, shift it to other people, exert their frustration and anger with the job on innocent coworkers, make excuses for not getting things done and seize to take responsibility for any error coming from their work among other things. However, I've been a